Im not sure if any of you guys are going to be reading this because my blogs have been kind of scarce lately, but I thought that I would give it a shot anyway...
Have you every felt that you wasting your time and everybody else's? I know that doesn't make sense, but sometimes I feel that I am just wasting everyone's time. That I am a complete failure, at home and at school. I mean I dont have a job right now, even though I have applied to a couple of places. Im hoping that I get a few interview, but even those dont guarantee a job. Lastly Im not doing so stellar at school. I may have made it above a 3.0 for the semester, but my overall GPA is about a 2.95 and this just makes me feel horrible. All of my friends are doing amazing in school, my one friend Nick has made deans list every semester that he has been in school. It just makes me wonder, whats wrong with me? If they can do it why can't I?I tried so hard this semester and there was still that one class that is always there that ruins everything. Sometimes I feel that I should forget about school and just live at home, working at some crummy place. I know this is me having a huge pity party, but I am not going to be able to sleep unless I get this out somewhere ya know.
I just want to stop feeling this way. That for some reason im not good enough, because lately that seems to be all that I am feeling. And I dont know how to make it go away. I know that deep down I know the answer, but I dont think im ready to acknowledge that yet.
I gonna go and try to get some sleep now. Hopefully getting all of this off my chest helps. Hope y'all have a good night. Promise next time there will be a much happier blog entry, one with no brooding. Thanks for listening.